Second Chances
by zaly
Summary: "Sometimes, you just need redemption. I'm the one who made this mess, and now, I'm the one who has to deal with it. I need my second chance." Lily Potter: a prophecy declared her responsible to defeat two Death Eaters, despite the grief gnawing her away.
1. Chapter 1

**I'm baaacckkk!! I finally got around to rewriting **_**The Girl Who Lived**_**! Yay! So, I made a few changes, but anyone who read the original will see them fairly easily. I found these changes to be necessary, because I'm using those ideas for another story I'm writing – this time it's a real book that I'm hoping to get published sometime. **

**Disclaimer: If I were J.K. Rowling, I would probably be working on another Harry Potter book right now.**

_The most terrible thing happened last night, and I am still crying my eyes out from it. Last night two people broke into our home and attempted murder. Not just any two people, but two old Death Eaters. Two Death Eaters that have crossed my path as well as Harry's. Yes, I am talking about the Carrows._

_It was late at night, just after Harry and I put the kids to bed and were just settling in ourselves. Just as I turned off our bedside lamp, I heard someone starting to wail, and I presumed that it was just Lily trying to sleep. Our little one-year-old had developed a habit of crying before she went to sleep so she would get some attention from her parents. Well, I just brushed it off, but I still had this feeling in my gut that something was wrong. I just snuggled farther into our bed and tried to sleep. A few minutes later, I heard a shriek of fear followed by malevolent laughter and cries of "Crucio!"_

_I instantly sprang out of bed and grabbed my wand from the bedside table and glanced up to see that Harry had done the same. Our eyes met for a fraction of a second, then we flew to the bedroom door, blasting anything and everything that was in our way. Once we darted out the door, we flew down the steps and to the door of the nursery, which was just barely cracked open. Harry and I immediately looked in the room, for Lily had stopped crying. I saw Amycus cradling Lily gently, almost lovingly. I was bubbling over with anger, getting ready to pounce on him, when it happened. There was a flash of green light that flooded the room. For a moment, I was mesmerized. I didn't know who or where I was, or what that fatal flash of light meant. Once the light faded, I crumpled onto the floor, crying, finally realizing that it meant that my baby was gone forever…_

As she read this, a tear rolled down her cheek and hit the already tearstained page. Even thirteen years later, the story still got to her. Lily was still amazed at her existence, how she fought off that awful curse…

Lily was merely packing her trunk for Hogwarts, as she did every year around this time, when she stumbled across her mother's old diary, open to that page as if it was daring her to read it again, daring her to relive that awful night, daring her to feel the way she did when her mother gave her that diary to better explain why she had the lightning bolt scar so like her father's. What was worse was what her mother had told her after she had read the diary.

She had a prophecy made about her, almost identical to the one made about her father. She was born for good, to defeat two of Lord Voldemort's most dedicated servants – the Carrows. They had recruited old Death Eaters, as well as their children. And I was supposed to stop them.

**Thanks for reading! I'm not exactly sure when the next chapter will be up, but I promise it will be fairly soon. Please review! I will take anything, as long as it is in my review box! I also accept PMs. Oh, and please tell me as soon as possible if there are any spelling or grammar mistakes, because I do not have a beta.**


	2. Diagon Alley

**A/N: Okay, so sorry about the wait. I realize that it has been FOREVER since I last updated, but my life has been so hectic lately… okay, no more excuses. I really am very sorry about the wait.**

**Disclaimer: I may live here, but I unfortunately do not own the world of Harry Potter.**

The bright sunlight warmed my face as I stepped on to the cobblestone roads of Diagon Alley. There were small pops as witches and wizards Apparated and Disapparated in and out of the Alley. We followed Mum as she began to turn into Madam Malkin's. "Hey, Mum!" James called from behind me, "Can we stop at George's shop first? He asked if we could stop by and check out some of his new items and see if Hogwarts students would be interested in buying them."

"Fine," Mum said lightly, not bothering to waste her breath warning us not to use them at school.

When we arrived at the large, vibrant shop, we all started laughing as we read a large, color-changing sign that read:

_In need of a new hairdo?  
Want to give your friends a makeover?  
Well, stop in and try our new hair-raising product, HairGum!  
Just chew the gum and instantly get a new set of locks!_

We all continued to snicker as we stepped in to the animated shop.

"Ah! My favorite costumers!" George greeted us with a wink. "What do you think of this? You think it'll sell?"

We instantly huddled around George to see his mystery product. There was a small, golden telescope laying in his hand, and, when Albus grabbed it to get a better look, both he and the telescope disappeared behind a cloud of smoke. "Albus!" Mum cried when Albus emerged from it sporting a newly bruised eye.

"Relax, Ginny," George soothed his sister and handed Albus an orange tube. "Just rub this on it and it will disappear in no time." He then turned to us and said: "Fighting Telescopes. You'll always know if someone had used you telescope…or you could lend it to some Slytherins."

We roared with laughter. "Those will definitely sell," James choked out between peals of laughter. "I can see their faces now…"

"Spoken like a true prankster. Now if you'll follow me, I have some more products for you to approve…and maybe even try for yourself," George said the last part just low enough for us to hear, but Mum was oblivious. He knew that she "disapproved" of us pranking people. He knew, of course, that she was all talk, and she could be a part of the pranking if she could, but he still played along with her act. "So, Gin, where's Harry this morning? I've never known him to turn down a trip to Diagon Alley."

"He couldn't get away from the office," Mum said wearily, "He's been there so often lately, there's so much for the Aurors to do, but there are never enough of them."

"Ah, that's too bad. Hey, isn't that Luna over there?" George replied.

"It is!" Mum exclaimed. "I haven't seen her in ages! I think I'll just have a quick word with her. Be right back!"

"And that's how you rid yourself of your mother," George said coolly. "We're just lucky that Luna walked past at the right time. Now back to business. If you'll just follow me…"

"…and this is where we keep our 'experimental' products," George said as he led us past the backroom, under a trapdoor, and into the cellar.

"What's that?" I ask, pointing to a heavily decorated box, covered in pink ribbons and doilies complete with horribly painted kittens.

"Oh, yes," George said with a sense of grandeur as he walked towards the corner where the box was kept. "These are our latest and greatest of all the Skiving Snackboxes." He then presented us with a box labeled "Umbridge-itis."

"Umbridge-itis?" Al asked. "What does it do?"

"Well," said George, then looked around and lowered his voice. "Everything."

"Everything?" I asked in wonder.

"Everything?" James asked in a disbelieving tone. "What do you mean, everything?"

"I mean," George continued in his hushed tone, "it is all of the Skiving Snackboxes combined."

"Like Nosebleed Nougat and Fever Fudge?" Al asked.

"And Puking Pastilles and Boil Brittle?" James asked.

"What about Fainting Fancies and Laryngitis Lollipops?" I asked, rounding out our favorites.

"And U-No-Poo," George said meaningfully.

"Wow," we said in unison.

"So it can do all that, and you chose a name like '_Umbridge-itis'_ ?" James asked.

"Well, there's actually a story behind it," George said as a spark ignited in his eyes that I recognized as one that most get when telling stories about their school days. "You see, when George and I were in our seventh year…"

Half an hour later (George tells his stories very thoroughly), we were still completely engrossed. George had told us every detail of the story that was Umbridge, and his story was winding toward a close: "…So, when Umbridge threatened us, we just summoned our brooms, hopped on, and rode into the sunset—quite literally. But the best part was our last words spoken as students of Hogwarts: 'Give her hell from us, Peeves!'"

"Oh, and he did," we heard from behind us. We all turned to see none other but our mother standing behind us.

"Ginny!" George exclaimed. "How nice of you to join us!"

"Reliving glory days, George?" she said with a smile.

"What are you talking about? I'm living my glory days as we speak. And anyways, I was explaining to your children the meaning behind Umbridge-itis," George said casually. "Would you like to do the honors of finishing up the story?"

"I sure would!" Mum said happily. "You see, as soon as Fred and George left, that's when we really wrecked havoc. Every student was competing to be the 'school pranksters', so there was more pranking going on than you could ever even imagine keeping track of. After awhile, people started using Skiving Snackboxes during her class more and more frequently. Once it caught on, entire classes would use them as soon as she walked in the door, complaining of 'Umbridge-itis.'"

"Now I get it," James said in realization.

"So why did you need to explain Umbridge-itis, exactly?" Mum questioned George.

"Well you see…" George said, and then trailed off. "Excuse me, ma'm," George continued and we all turned to look at the dumpy little witch standing behind us. She was short and stout—she couldn't be any taller than me, the shortest of the group (I was only a fourth year). I couldn't see her face, for she had her hood pulled up, covering her face. She was oddly lumpy, and, somehow, I had a sense of déjà vu. Like I had seen her before. Like I knew her.

And then she pulled off her hood.

We all gasped. I did know her. I had never met her , and yet...I had still recognized her face. It was a face that I could have picked out of a crowd in a second.

It was the face of Alecto Carrow.

She had pulled off his hood and pointed his wand at us in one fluid movement, much more graceful than I would have expected from the aging woman. "Now you listen to me carefully. You have until the count of three to hand over the girl and get out of here. You are not to tell anyone of this, unless you want to end up dead."

I was terrified. Give myself up? I just couldn't do it. I was supposed to defeat him, not let him kill me. But then again…It was my family at stake. I couldn't let them die just to let me live. That would be like me killing them off myself.

"One…"

I took a deep breath and glanced at my family. James and Al looked just as terrified as I felt. Mom and Fred just looked like they were ready to give him hell.

"Two…"

I knew it was time to act. And before they could stop me, I stepped forward.

**Sorry about the previous post…I thought I finished it, when, in actuality, I had stopped it right when George "trailed off." Sorry about that. Please R&R! I stayed up late for all of you, even though I'll be falling asleep tomorrow…I have an awards ceremony in a city about two hours away from our minute town. So please, please, please, PLEASE tell me what you think! Or I will go completely crazy! Please! You don't want that! And I will try my best to update much more frequently, with this story and Ten Fingers. And if you haven't read Ten Fingers, do so NOW. Please. And R&R for that, too. I need ideas. I've run dry on ideas for Ten Fingers. I'm desperate. PLEASE.**


	3. Diagon Alley: The Battle

**I apologize. For not being a very consistent updater-er. I'm sorry. I'm doing my best. But I just have so many different ideas bouncing around in my head all the time. I just can never shake them out of my brain even for a tiny little bit to update one of my stories. I am truly, deeply sorry for that.**

I felt a hand jerk me back towards my family as I heard curses being shouted around me. I pulled my wand out of my back pocket and started to use my small arsenal of curses and jinxes alongside my mother, uncle, and brothers. I dodged a jet of blue light, and then a small, concentrated stream of green light barely missed my ear and hit the back wall, which exploded. With dust and rubble surrounding us, we brought our spar out into the street.

Before I knew it, I was engulfed in a full-out battle. You'd think that a witch, a wizard, and three wizards-in-training could defeat the elderly Death Eater in a matter of minutes. But that wasn't the case. Somehow, Alecto had summoned all of the Death Eaters—the ones from the past and mainly their children, with a few exceptions—to come and duel us. It went from one versus five to a hundred versus five. Our battle sent all of the shoppers to cowering in alleys and anywhere that they could hide.

I stepped behind a large boulder and took cover. I instantly began shooting all of the useful spells that I knew from behind my refuge: Stunning Spells, Jelly-Legs Jinx, I even used Wingardium Leviosa on some of the ruins of George's shop and hit some Death Eaters over the head with the various debris. I stayed in my sanctuary for as long as possible—until a Death Eater finally realized that I was back there shooting curses at them and blew it up. By then, I was panicking. Their numbers never diminishing, they seemed to be determined to win this fight, and they stood strong and valiant. And we were tired. We had been fighting for what had seemed like days, but the sun was still high and shining over the battle, as if it were a perfect day. Mum was still fighting, but I could see minute wrinkles in Mum's forehead, a sign of her fatigue. George shot curses out in an endless stream at whoever he could hit. It looked as if he was taking this opportunity to avenge his twin's death. But the spark in his eyes seemed to have extinguished and the curses seemed to come less rapidly. James and Albus had another circumstance. They still had plenty of energy, but had horrid tactics. They weren't defending themselves at all and were shooting out curses at random, with no aim to speak of. We needed help, and fast.

Just then an army of Aurors came running as if they had heard my mental plea for help. Leading the way was none other than my father. He bolted towards the battle and hurdled the rubble, all the while shooting curses left and right at the Death Eaters.

The Death Eaters had the same look on their faces—fear. They knew that if their great and almighty leader Voldemort couldn't defeat him, then there was no way that their cult could destroy him. Every single Death Eater seemed to want to give up and hide—I assumed that it was the Slytherin in all of them coming out—until I looked over and saw Alecto's face. She had an evil grin on her face. It seemed as if she had a plan and was hell-bent on making it happen. It scared me, but I kept fighting. I tried to keep my mind away from Alecto's haunting face, but it was unforgettable.

I decided to try a new tactic—I concentrated on one Death Eater until they fell to the ground. That worked for about a minute. The Death Eaters were stronger than I was. Even though I knew (how could I not with my parents?) that it was possible for younger, much less powerful wizards to defeat more experienced, wickedly corrupted souls, it felt impossible to me. Is this how Dad felt? Did he ever feel like it was completely unfeasible to fulfill the prophecy? Did that thought ever cross his mind? From all the stories that I had heard, he had never wavered in his determination to defeat Voldemort. And yet, here I was, with a lesser wizard after me and I feel utterly inadequate.

My reverie was shattered when I somehow saw twin jets of green light shoot out simultaneously. One was headed for Al, and the other one was coming at me. I was frozen. I couldn't move. And before I knew it, the spell was upon me. I winced and closed my eyes, preparing myself for the end.

But it never came. I heard something fall to the ground in front of me. I timidly opened my eyes to see what had stopped my imminent death. And there, in front of me, laid my father. Dead. And it was my fault. If I hadn't been so cowardly, if I had fought back more fearlessly, if I had thought to just _move_, if…

I looked over, expecting to see Al's body lying mangled on the rubble, but I saw another horrid feat had been performed. I had thought that losing my Dad and my brother would have been the aim, but to my horror, both my parents had acted as the Death Eaters had planned. Mum was lying in the distorted state that I had expected Al to be in.

I looked up, tears blurring my vision, to see who had performed this unforgivable crime. All I could see was _her. Her_ leering face, _her_ wand pointed at Dad's corpse, _her_ eyes staring straight at me.

That was what gave me the will to fight. I stood up, stepped over Dad's body, and shot every curse that I had ever heard of at her. Stunning Spells, Full-Body Bind, Rictusempra, Disarming Spell, Confundus Charm…it didn't matter if I had ever used them before, I was using them now. I was going to destroy Alecto Carrow if it was the last thing I did. And I was going to destroy her right here, right now.

There she was, mocking me. Then she ran. She ran out of sight, going for the dark alleyways in between shops. I instantly sprinted after her, all the while ignoring the shouts begging me not to go after her.

"YOU THINK YOU CAN MURDER MY PARENTS AND GET AWAY WITH IT?" I shouted at her.

"Apparently I can," she cackled. "I kill them and the only one who comes after me is a tiny little witch, not even trained enough to duel properly? What are you going to do to me? Huh? Kill me? Like you have it in you. I saw you earlier. You were losing faith in yourself just watching everyone else fight your battle for you. And now, here you are. So I'll ask you again. What are you going to do to me?"

I just stood there, unequivocally murderous. So many different options ran through my head. The most reoccurring choices included Unforgivables and a one-way ticket to Azkaban. But I couldn't do any of them. She was right. I wasn't capable. But what else could I do? She was a malevolent, full-grown witch, and I was an underage school girl who couldn't even figure out what to do. So I just let my instincts take over. "_Expelliarmus!_" I heard my voice ring out in the darkness. I reached up and caught her wand easily. "How do you like me now?"

"Oh, you took my wand. Your parents will be so proud…oh, wait…"

I was seething. "_Stupefy!" _ I roared. I saw her fall to the ground with pleasure. I then walked over and stood over her limp body. As soon as I saw her helpless, my body had a fit. I started jumping up and down, feeling her bones break beneath my shoes with morbid satisfaction. Panting, I looked down to examine the damage I had done. It looked as if I had broken one of her arms and one of her legs in multiple places. It appeared as if she had broken quite a few ribs and possibly all of them. "They would be," I whispered, more to myself than to her. Still panting, I stepped on her nose for good measure and walked back to what was left of my family.

There was a crowd forming around the battle grounds. I broke through them silently. There I saw James, Al, and George kneeling by Mum and Dad as I had expected. But I also noticed that more of the family had come. Bill, Fleur, Percy, and Audrey had all come, and I saw Angelina coming through the crowd that seemed to still be growing.

Buy now, my instinctual anger had substantially subsided. Now my grief dominated. It was finally sinking in. My parents were gone. Gone. _Gone. _They were never coming back. I gazed upon my family surrounding Mum and Dad, searching for some comfort. Instead, all I saw were sad eyes gazing at the greatest hero in the wizarding community and his wife.

**Okay, so I know that this was really short—as all of my chapters so far have been—but I just couldn't think of what else to add. I kept coming back and thinking what else to add and when I sat down to work on it today, it seemed like I didn't **_**need**_** anything else. It works as is. Is it perfect? No. Is it how I wanted it? No. Did Harry and Ginny deserve more? Yes. But I just honestly couldn't think of anything and you guys deserve an update. ****And maybe one of these days, i will come back and fix it and get it to where I want it to be. And hopefully that day comes soon. Now it's your turn. Please review. Please. You don't even know how much reviews help me. Seriously. even if it's a one-word review. It helps. Please. And I quite honestly prefer reviews that have ways that I can improve rather than "Oh, that was so great." But I'll take those, too.**

**P.s. sorry about the all caps at the end. I pressed some button somewhere and word is stuck on caps lock. but it's not the caps lock button. I checked that. My computer kind of hates me. we have this whole Love-hate thing going on. Just know that I'm not angry, and I'm not yelling at you. And I love you. Just because you read my story. Aren't you special?**


	4. Gone

**So, once again, sorry about that last chapter. I know it was really short. But it was just so **_**hard**_** to write the deaths for two of the most beloved characters in the series…maybe even the world. Plus, that was my first actual death scene. I have written stories in first person when the main character died, but never having to watch and feel the emotions that death brings. This chapter will be much more emotional. Much. I promise. I personally think that it will capture the way it feels to lose someone close to you much better than I did in the battle scene.**

**Please, forgive any mistakes that I made and tell me about them in a review. I was going to have my sister proofread it before I posted it, but she still hasn't read it and I thought you all deserved an update.**

**And I really, really, **_**really **_**need a beta. Really badly. I've never had a beta before, so I don't know exactly how the whole process works. But I have a pretty good hold on it. If anyone is interested, contact me. Preferably through PM, but if you really need to, then you can add it in a review.**

**Disclaimer: I technically don't own any of the characters. But I do own some of the younger one's personalities. To an extent. And I don't own Love and Theft, or their music.**

**Extra note: When I have lyrics paired with some of the story, then listen to the song while reading. It adds a whole other dimension and it makes it really cool. (Or at least I think so.) And that does make it kind of like a songfic, but I think that it's not so much because the music was matched to the story, not the story matched to the song. But that's just my opinion. And when did that ever start counting?**

**This is the last thing, I promise!: From here on in, the story's going to take a turn towards angst. Major angst. So if you don't like that, don't read any more because it's not going to get any better. However, I would prefer that you would read this chapter and try it. You might just like how I do angst. Or, maybe you could just say that you don't like angst, but still comment on my writing. Ways to improve, things I did well, things that need adjustment…if you don't like angst, then you would probably be better at picking these things out, anyways. I know this author's note was extremely long, but they are things you need to know! I apologize, and present my next chapter (which is my best so far, if I do say so myself).**

Gone. Gone. _Gone._

The only words that I could hear resounding in my head: Gone. Gone. _Gone._

And it was my fault. All my fault. If it wasn't for me, James and Al would still have parents, they would still have some innocence left…

I can't stand this. This is torture. I can't get the horrible image of _them_ lying on the ground, dead. Dead. Never coming back. Gone. Gone. _Gone._

A small piece of me died with _them._ My soul. My soul is dead. Gone. Gone. _Gone._

So now, here I am, surrounded by people. They are all mourning, but how could they possibly feel as bad as me? I am the cause of their death. I should have signed _their_ death certificates.

And the media. Everyday is a new story on _their_ lives. Or their deaths. Or how the whole wizarding world is mourning. The whole wizarding world isn't in mourning. Half of them don't even know _them._ They don't know pain. How could they? Was it their parents who died? Were they the cause of _their_ death? No. And now _they're_ gone. Gone. _Gone._

No one can comfort me. Is there still comfort left in the world? All these people, they claim to be just as torn up as I am, but they're wrong. They're wrong. I'm the cause of _their_ death. It was me. It was me.

Every family member that we posses is sitting at this table, eating supper with melancholy dampening the air. No laughter and barely any conversation. All conversation was directed towards _them._ I just looked down and pushed the food around on my plate. I felt a pair of eyes on me. I looked up and my eyes met with Roxanne's bright blue orbs. She used her head to motion towards the staircase. I nodded and placed my fork on top of my plate.

When I arrived in my room, I was greeted by a huge hug. We just stood there for a few minutes, hugging and pausing all the hurt and pain in the world, if only for a moment. When she finally pulled away, I felt all of my guilt come crashing back on top of me. My fault. Gone. Gone. _Gone._

"Do you want to talk about it?" Roxanne asked as she brushed a piece of silky black locks out of her face. She was always so straight forward. She wasn't one to beat around the bush. She knew it would be better this way, seeing as I had already had so many sympathies shoved in my face over the last twenty-four hours.

"Not really," I said honestly. I don't want to think about _them_ any more than I already was.

"Okay," she said, and we sat in silence, neither wanting to break it.

After everybody left, I climbed the stairs and returned to my bedroom almost immediately. There, I pushed the play button and heard a few bars of Love and Theft's "World Wide Open" when I hit the skip button and stopped on track eleven. "Drowning." The sweet music of the introduction drift out of the speakers and flopped onto my bed and listened to the voices that seemed to be singing to me…

_Caught in a landslide  
Nowhere to hide  
Chasing distractions  
Empty inside  
I'm still waiting for salvation…_

All I could think about was how much the song mirrored my life. I'm so tangled in everything going on: Alecto, the battle, their deaths, my fault, my fault…

I'm just so empty. I have been robbed of my soul and my innocence. And neither are coming back. There's nothing I can do. And it's killing me, slowly but surely.

I woke up to "Drowning," still belting out of the stereo. Today was the day. Today was the day we were burying our parents.

It was strange to think about—it was unreal, a fantasy. No one ever imagines burying their parents, but here we are. We don't have a choice. Because they're gone. Gone. _Gone._

I ambled down the stairs in my best outfit. Black dress pants, black tank top, black cardigan, black shoes. It was sweltering outside, but I didn't care. I never really liked wearing black, but now it's all I can even think about wearing. It just seems disrespectful not to. At least we'll be leaving for Hogwarts soon, so I won't stick out so much when I wear it.

Wow. When I'm depressed I think about really stupid things. Since when have I ever cared about how much I stick out? I'm _his_ daughter, damn it. I should be used to be stared at. So why should I care what people think when I'm wearing black? Wouldn't they expect it? _Shouldn't_ they expect it? Why am I still so stressed out about what people think all of a sudden? _They _never did.

I opened the door to the kitchen to see Al and James eating cereal and wearing similar attire to mine. I didn't put forth the effort to give either an encouraging smile, nor did they. I don't think that I'll ever be able to smile again. It just doesn't feel right. Not when _they_ aren't here.

After eating our breakfast in silence, we all moved as one to the fireplace. James could have Apparated there, but I think that he wanted to stay with us all day, whether he would admit it or not.

It was difficult to even muster up the energy to croak out the words "Godric's Hollow." I didn't want to speak. I don't ever want to speak again. I never want to open my mouth again. For anything. Ever.

I stepped out of the fireplace in the back of the church and brushed the ashes off of my black clothing. I stepped out of the way so as to allow Al to enter into the church without knocking me to the ground. I looked around and spotted a door leading directly to the graveyard behind the chapel. I walked out, hoping to inhale some fresh air and exhale some of my despair.

My eyes immediately flew to the two freshly dug holes in the ground. In a couple of hours, _they_ would be in those holes. When the presider lowers the caskets in to the gap, filling them, it will only widen the fissures that began forming the second I saw _him_ jump out in front of me. I walked towards the holes, and examined the headstones beside the freshly overturned earth.

_James Potter Lily Potter  
Born 27 March 1960 Born 30 January 1960  
Died 31 October 1981 Died 31 October 1981_

_The last enemy that shall be destroyed is death._

My eyes scanned over the words embedded in white marble as the stone at Hogwarts was, and my eyes began to brim with tears. It finally seemed to hit me. My parents were gone. Gone. _Gone._

They were never coming back. Neither were my grandparents. I never even had the chance to meet them. They were gone before I had the chance. And now _they_ joined them. They were all gone. Gone. _Gone._

I slowly began my voyage back towards the back of the chapel. I couldn't be late for the ceremony. It wouldn't be right. They gave me everything I could ever desire—food, clothes, shelter, _life_; it was the least I could do to show up on time.

I was greeted by a sea of black, surrounded by white walls. The church was full, or as full as it would be for the ceremony. Everyone knew _they_ wouldn't want a big affair. _They_ would want an intimate gathering of family of friends.

The whole affair was long and difficult. We heard stories that we had been told more times than we can count, tales that had been recounted more than we care to remember, and a few new ones that we had never heard. Such as Neville's:

"I remember it like it was yesterday. The Weasleys and Harry had left early for the holidays, but it was a mystery why. The night they left, Harry had woken up from a nightmare, screaming and vomiting. I went for Professor McGonagall, and when we got back, she took Harry and Ron to Professor Dumbledore's office. The next day, every single one of the Weasleys were gone.

"The next time I saw them, it was Christmas Day. I was visiting Mum and Dad at St. Mungo's with Gran. We had the curtains pulled around their beds, but we could still hear the Healer come in with Lockheart, who I may or may not have let out of the ward…but that's another story. I had no clue who had come in with him, I just know that I felt sorry for whoever it was. He was forcing his autographed photos on them, as well as forcing one of them to put them in envelopes.de sdafasdrfe I stayed and talked to Mum and Dad for a few more minutes when Gran announced it was time to be on our way. She stood up and pulled the curtains back. When I saw Harry, Hermione, Ron, and Ginny sitting beside Lockheart's bed, my eyes instantly found the floor. I didn't want them to see me. I hadn't told anyone about my parents and now all of my friends were going to find out. But when I heard Ron shout 'Neville!' I knew it was too late. Gran was going to tell them everything. My parents, their torture, how she seemed to think I was ashamed of them…I just wasn't ready for everyone to know. I was too distracted by trying not to meet their faces to listen to Gran figure out who was who.

"But I clearly heard her when she said to Hermione: '…but he hasn't got his father's talent, I'm afraid to say…' They were all clever people and I knew that they would put two and two together and realize what my secret was.

"That's when Harry helped me most. It wasn't when he was out saving us all from Voldemort, or even when he was teaching us how to fend for ourselves—although I am very grateful that he did. It was when I saw him try to stamp on Ron's foot without me noticing. He knew it was a sensitive subject for me, and he was trying to help. Ginny and Harry were always like that. Looking out for others. Caring for other's safety before their own. I guess they were just meant for each other that way. It was a trait they shared. And it is a trait that I will remember forever, long after they're buried." Neville walked away from the pulpit and back to his seat.

The presider, short and stout, rose from his chair and walked down the steps of the alter towards the caskets. That was the cue for the pallbearers to make their way toward the caskets. They were all men, as was tradition: Bill, Charlie, Percy, George, Ron, James, Al, Hugo, Louis, and Fred ambled to the caskets and slowly lifted them out of their carefully placed stands and headed up the aisle way and through the double doors. As they walked past, the congregation rose and followed them into the bright streets of Godric's Hollow.

The path leading from the church doors to the kissing gate that marked the entrance of the cemetery was lined with people. They were all silent, holding candles and clearing the way for our procession. It was then that I realized just how many people cared about _them._ They were loved, treasured even, and they were dead because of me. Dead. Gone. Gone. _Gone_.

I was swallowed by the parade as we made our way to the two freshly overturned piles of earth where I had already shed tears. I watched as the pallbearers gently placed the caskets on what appeared to be thin air; however, I knew that the presider had placed a charm on the holes so that the caskets would float over them until it was time to lower them into _their_ final resting place.

Once the caskets had been set in place, I caught James's eye, then Al's, as they walked towards their place next to me. Each nodded to me, grief consuming them, and I closed my eyes and swallowed so as to hide my pain.

"We are gathered here to lay Harry and Ginny to rest," the presider spoke empty words. His words meant nothing to me, to anyone else here. His words were not ones of grief, of emptiness, of sadness. His words were not of how wonderful_ they_ were, what good people _they_ were, how _they _loved with all their hearts. No. His words were those general words you hear spoken at all funerals. Cold. Empty.

The only words that he said the actually pertained to their lives were the inevitable: words of the fight against Voldemort. Of course, it was a huge piece of the puzzle that is my parents, but it was miniscule compared to the ones of _their_ friends and family, and certainly not the only one. Actually, _their_ friends and family were combined into one. _They_ accepted their friends as family. It was all one. One huge, loving, happy puzzle piece.

_Been walking for days now  
With nowhere to go  
Chasing horizons  
Even though  
I don't know where I should run to…_

I feel like I'm just wandering around in circles. No destination, no ending point. Nowhere to go, nowhere to be. I would normally feel liberated from the normal "I have to be everywhere at once," but for the first time in my life, I didn't want the world to stop. I wanted it to keep going, to rotate faster, so that I can finally escape this personal hell.

The presider was finished with his meaningless speech. He pulled his wand out of his robes and made an alien movement. Before I knew it, _they_ were being lowered into the ground. This isn't a dream. This is real. _They_ are gone. Gone. _Gone._

_So save me,  
I'm drowning alive  
And keep me  
From dying inside…_

This is killing me. I need to leave. I need to escape. I can't be here anymore. Not now. I can't. It's suffocating me. I'm drowning. I'm dying. Slowly but surely…

I could hear the caskets creak when they hit the bottom of the man-made crevice. The presider lifted his wand; the tip of his wand tracing the direction that the fresh pile of earth was to take. This was it. _They_ were going to be buried. In a matter of seconds, _they_ would be underground with so many of my other loved ones: Lily, James, Grandpa and Grandma Weasley, Fred, my unborn older sibling…too many.

I felt more tears flowing to the surface of my eyes. There was no stopping the waterworks now.

Something warm crept into my hand as I stood there, tears streaming down my face. I looked down to see Roxanne's hand in mine. Our tear-filled eyes met. She gave me a small, encouraging smile, but I could only hear one thing echoing inside my head:

Gone. Gone. _Gone._

**Okay, I have a few things to clear up. If you noticed, whenever Lily was referring to Harry, Ginny, or both, she always used a pronoun of some sort, and they were all in italics. That's because she's too pained to even think their names. That's the same reason why she avoided words like grave, tomb, etc. She also repeated "Gone. Gone. **_**Gone," **_**a lot, as well. That's the sound of her guilt resounding through her brain. And the song inserts…that was partially for my enjoyment, partially for yours, and mostly because her thoughts kept returning to that song.**

**I feel like that was one of the best pieces of writing that I've ever written in my entire life. If not **_**the **_**best thing I've ever written. So please, review. I'm going to need it if I'm going to grow in my writing and make chapters even better!**

**If I had written 461 more words in the actual story, then it would have been 3,000 words! That's a huge milestone for me. I still remember the days when I had trouble writing 300 words. Sometimes, I have trouble writing longer stories, purely because I get excited and feel like I need to post it right away. But from now on, I'm going to work more on giving you guys longer, better written chapters rather than shorter stories that are lacking some key elements and emotions. The only problem with that is I will not be able to update as frequently. It really won't be too much different at first because I wasn't a very consistent updater before, but now I'm getting into the swing of the story and I will be able to update faster, as long as life doesn't get in the way. So even if I haven't updated in a very long time—and I'm talking months here—don't think that I've given up on the story. I'm probably either really busy with life or I'm writing a very difficult chapter. And most of these will be very difficult, seeing as I've never experienced a lot of the feelings that Lily will be. So even if I haven't updated in awhile, don't hesitate to review! I will still see it! I promise!**

**I apologize for both of the incredibly long author's notes. I will try to keep them to a minimum in future chapters.**

**Ready, set, REVIEW!**


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